GLUTTONS FOR PUNISHMENT

I decided to test the waters of corporal punishment. Frankly, it’s what my students understand in terms of discipline and to be a truly independent teacher here, one needs to embrace it or forfeit their position as head of the classroom. I’ve been watching my coworkers closely when they punish the students and I’m feeling more comfortable with the lines. Granted, I have no intentions of pushing any lines or boundaries but it’s becoming clear to me with my naughty students I need more than just "Get out!" Remembering the story of the little duck Ping on the Yang Tse River from my childhood, I was inspired to try light swatting.

Having had my sorted past, I’m quite adept at hitting someone and make a loud noise without causing much pain (and vice versa). I decided on Friday (11/17) to start bringing a folded up map to class to swat the naughty students with. Folded up maps make a lot of noise for what little they hurt when you hit someone.

So, for the past few days (it’s Tuesday 11/21 evening) I’ve been swatting at the naughty students. It makes a loud noise, everyone gets jolted for a second and then the class laughs. I don’t do it out of rage or anger and I don’t yell at them about what bad students they are (like my coworkers do; I’m not comfortable with that AND I’ve been told that our school is quite "progressive" in terms of not hitting students) when I do it. I simply yell them to "Stop," "Be quiet," "Behave," or "Wake up!" I’m not worried about hurting them as they hit each other full-on for the ten minute break between each class and I pat my friends’ backs harder when I hug them hello.

They love it. I don’t get it but they love it. They stand up immediately after being swatted and give it their all. It’s fired them up.

Quiet students who used to nap during my class and insisted that they can’t speak English have been giddy and leap to say, "Hello!" as I pass in the hallway. The giddy bad boys who sit in the back of class who used to make eyes at me now line up and breathlessly say, "Hello teacher [insert the title of the last class’s lesson]" whenever I pass. And it’s really inspired them to try harder and pay attention in their class. Again, I don’t get it but it works and they love it.

I spoke to my Brazilian Angel about it and she said, "Of course it works. It’s quite sexy."

I think it’s fair to say I don’t get other people’s libidos.