WATER WATER EVERYWHERE

Everywhere I turn, there are gorgeous men and lots of whom want to sleep with me but none of whom are available. It’s killing me.

Last night, I went on my first pub-crawl since I came to China. I got super hammered and had a great time. All of the most gorgeous men I know in West Egg were all distinctly aware that their wives were away and that I am single. The night ended with me being propositioned for a threesome with the most beautiful Francophile couple. It was a difficult decision but ultimately, I decided that even though the Parisian is one of the most gorgeous men I’ve ever seen, I really don’t want to test drive him, being as he’s not for sale.

Then, this morning I was invited out to lunch with some of my Chinese friends. There was a PLA policeman at the lunch. Dear god he was delicious. He was super aggressive and an amazing dose of testosterone. He was, in fact, so single minded about getting my attention that our mutual friends apologized on his behalf. It was fantastic and very dangerous. The last thing I need is to hook up with an aggressive, PLA special policeman running high on testosterone but dear god, it’s hard to turn down a handsome, solidly built man’s man singularly focused on seducing me. There’s just something about a man with the right swagger. I seriously need to be manhandled.