FAMILY

That family of which I was speaking earlier has reared it’s (not-so) ugly head. It’s just heat breaking.

One of my girls here has had her heartbroken. The man she has loved since before she understood love has left her entirely. His parents have deemed her “too poor” to marry, despite the fact that they come from the same town and have less money than her family. They told her they would reconsider after she wrote his father a letter explaining that her drive would change her familial destiny of “poverty” and that she would be a success.

And it’s true. She’s worked her whole life and she’s dragged herself up to make it in the “Big City” of Xi’An. In a world that values women who strive to be Paris Hilton, she’s gotten herself from “farm girl” (the Chinese equivalent of the Indian “untouchables”) to “Xi’An English Teacher” (the most respected type in a highly respected profession). She works twelve hours a day, seven days a week and rests only during a few days every New Year. She is an amazing woman and has accomplished so much in her life. I can only imagine how much she has left to accomplish. Were I in a position to bring anyone to America, I would choose her as she has never depended on the gifts of others to accomplish.

Nevertheless, the patriarchy that views woman as mere receptacles for the abuse of men has deemed her unworthy of the love of her life. And the love of her life, being a coward and a repugnant human being, has kowtowed to wishes of his parents. I find it morally repugnant the way that the Chinese lack the will to ever stand up to their family. It’s not that I necessarily advocate the American style of always standing up to your family for everyone but in this situation, he truly needs to grow a set and be a man.

Actually, in the long run, he needs to do nothing. If he is, as I originally estimated him to be, then he needs to wallow in his cowardice and reap what his cowardice sows. I find comfort in the idea that anyone who could do that to my girl will always live knowing he had perfection and because of his cowardice, he let it slip away. For that reason alone, I wish him an eternity of crystalline, lucid thought. May he never know a moment’s senility and on his deathbed may the memory of having been loved so completely and allowing his castrati-like behavior to turn it away be as fresh as it is now.